Stages of Relationship Development

In an effort to fulfill our intrapersonal needs, we seek to establish interpersonal relationships. Again: intrapersonal needs include affection, inclusion, respect and control. 

If I meet someone new (initiating), I will assess how the other person communicates with me (experimenting). If it’s positive and favorable, I will choose to have repeated interactions (intensifying), and we will begin to disclose our needs (integrating). We will give and receive effective feedback (revising) and establish trust (bonding). Throughout the duration of our relationship development, we will always be revising as our communication contexts will change. 

The key takeaway from this model is that relationships require communication competency. A thriving relationship mutually fulfills the intrapersonal needs of two individuals consistently over a period of time. If that’s not happening then the relationship will disintegrate.